I just scrolled through more than six hundred "new" items at HomeDecorators.com to find something blogworthy. Success! Check out this Figo series of tables and etageres (from top, $399, $499, and $1299):



Not much I can criticize here -- crazy, I know. Any one of these pieces would look at home in Christiane Lemieux's beautiful Meyer Davis-designed loft in the mag's current issue, or that store Ochre, or some place more maximal like the apartment swimming around in my head. Who can decorate when the Project Runway finale's on?? With their simplest Parsons-style construction, normal looking metal, aged oak shelves ... beats me why they'd ever call them "shabby chic."

Okay, I admit it's not the best time to recommend spending your imperiled clams on, say, antelope minaudieres, but we all need a place to sit and eat. And I feel bad for the NYC college freshman currently in their second month of school who completely missed out on the flush Sex and the City years (a blessing, I think), so here's a little sumpin' for that dorm room: the Real Good Chair from Urban. Sure it's not grammatically correct ... but is it fugly?


It ships flat (only to the lower 48) and when opened up looks like a powder blue Swiss Army knife. They call it comfy; I think it might cut me. But it's ironic and sculptural and sort of Moss-on-the-cheap ($100 each).

And FUGLY?

Speak.

If you can get past the name (believe me it took some effort on my part), Design Diva Fabrics is an incredible resource.  I don't know where they're getting all these old designer fabrics but the merch serves as one big, sad reminder that most of the good fabrics eventually go to that showroom in the sky.  Why??  Would Clarence House come up with something as quirky as this tennis toile in 2008?

Doubtful.  It's currently on sale for $30.16 per yard or about 80% off the (original) list price.  Oh, and DDF has a feature where you vote on your favorite fabric and the winners enter a kind of lightning round, the price per yard going down by the second until some lucky decorating fiend gets the lot of it for waaay less than listed.  Totally in keeping with the U.S. Americans' lottery mentality!  Other favorites include this Lee Jofa crewel at deep discount (pretty sure it's not discontinued ... yet):

and Clarence House cotton Scottish tartan at only 16 bucks a yard:

Have to credit friend Bina for reminding me of The Container Store's annual shelving sale: it's on, b@*&#es!! 25% off the whole selection. My fave is the InterMetro series (is it new? seems so) including this white etagere for $122.94, reduced from $163.93:

Another lesson in bad prop styling, especially because this thing supports up to 300 pounds! Can't you see some books and nice seagrass baskets and tchotchkes under that television? Or their charming feathergain boxes?

I tend to forget about Room & Board because it doesn't churn out flashy collections season after season, but it's a great spot for the basics. Plus from what I hear the construction quality tops that of other, more trend-conscious chain stores. For instance they definitely play up the mitered corners on this stainless steel Portica Canopy Bed:

Pretty chic on its own, but with a little DIY upholstery it could resemble the STUNNING (and stunningly expensive) Ralph Lauren RL1 Bed:

If you don't like the Portica's mattress-only platform (and don't need the storage space underneath), I'd cut some masonite panels to fit between the stainless supports on the front and sides all the way to the floor and also in between the headboard supports, then apply some 2-inch foam, and upholster each in a solid linen with a staplegun. I don't think you'd have to drill into the metal to adhere, maybe just epoxy with some "L" brackets. I love this bed but without the added softness of a box spring (is it 'box spring' or 'boxed springs'??) -- ideally an upholstered box spring -- it could use some more tailoring.

Dateline: Red Hook, September 29: Mugatu and I are eating chicken fingers in the Ikea cafeteria, which looks like the movie Toys crossed with a Flunch, site of recurring nightmares I have about the French banlieue. Madonna's singing 'Borderline' and every television in the place is set to C-Span with Congress about to veto saving our collective, overspending asses. I'm skeert.

But we have shopping to do! I don't know where trends originate, but Line Gerdeverholmsken or whoever has tapped into this Industrial Revolution moment and designed a pretty smart desk:

I like that it's solid wood painted white and that the trestle bases have little shelves for extra storage. Not sure I'd love looking at all the extra napkins and straws in my desk drawer through that clear glass top, but for only $149 I might ditch it and make my own stainless or mirror version. Or add some gears and doodads to the adjustable base and pretend I'm a factory worker or metal lather or some trade I'll need to learn when no one wants $40,000 curtains anymore.

My go-to recommendation for wood Venetian blinds has always been Smith + Noble, but I recently priced a barebones 2" blind for a smallish window and the total came to $180. Too rich for my blood. But then Zach, who's demanding credit and residuals on this deal, had a full-on freak attack when his order arrived from Blinds.com. They carry a range of wood and faux wood Venetian blinds for as little as $42 and if you disregard all the ugly colors and context photos:


you can score some major chicness, like Zach's ebony-and-white-tape combo, or a simple white and red, white and kelly green, and so on. Also why not glue on your own decorative tape -- a Greek key or something snazzy -- to their standard option?

It's getting pretty rough out there, right? In harsh economic times like these I'm grateful not to have a car, a mortgage, kids, or a job on Wall Street. I can't even think about decorating my little downtown hovel ... in fact a thatch hut in Costa Rica ain't sounding too bad! To save for the ticket I'm putting all my nickels into one of these Koons-ian Doggy Banks, converting them into cash at Commerce Bank's Penny Arcade, and stuffing the bills under my mattress:

I always wanted to learn to surf, anyway.

This is us at work. Finally! We were in a great store called Studio 111 on the road into Palm Springs. He had these wonderful paintings that looked like there were made from wax but were actually glue. Luckily - as wax would have definitely melted in the heat. So in my bossy way I wanted to gather them from around the store and re hang them above the sofa you can see here.

Once we have sorted out the spot that is going to best represent the store, Justin Bernhaut - our amazing photographer - starts shooting and i start taking notes.

We do this around and around until we have been in every shop and restaurant we like. And then it is back to HQ with film and notes.

Am just back from Palm Springs. Definately one of the most fun shopping trips I have done. You just can't help get taken off by the atmosphere of old Hollywood, the heat, the desert, those incredible mountains all around you, the way the light hits them, the architecture and the bright colours. I was staying at The Parker, which is just beautiful. It is a resort in the proper sense of the word. It is very easy to arrive here and never leave.

Order a muddled lemonade here and it won't really matter what you do the rest of the day! I had an afternoon poolside with my Marilyn issue of Vanity Fair....

I found that while I was in Palm Springs, more than anywhere else, I wanted to dress differently. Pink sunglasses, white sundresses, headcarves. If you go, it is part of the fun to make sure you have your pucci beach towel and well stocked basket for your poolside afternoons and high heels for forays out to the shops.